“I’ve been telling my dream to the scarecrow, about the places that I’d like to see. I say, ‘friend do you think I’ll ever get there?’ oh but he just stands there smiling back at me.
“So I confess my sins to the preacher, about the love I’ve been praying to find. Is there a brown eye’d boy in my future? He says, ‘girl, you’ve got nothing but time’
“But how do you wait for heaven
And who has that much time
And how do you keep your feet on the ground
When you know, that you were born, you were born to fly?”
So how do you keep your feet on the ground, when you know you were born to fly? Or more applicable to the point I’m trying to make –> how do you keep your trust in God (during single years), when you know you were made for marriage?
This is a question I’ve been wrestling with a lot lately. During a time in my life when my peers are getting married, when someone new posts their happy engagement shots all over Facebook every other day (fun fact – I had 15 friends get engaged this summer… and I don’t have that many friends people!) it’s easy to let your mind spiral into a sea of jealousy, doubt and despair.
So let’s just get something out in the open, shall we?
I’ve never kissed a boy. I’ve never been in a labeled ‘dating relationship’. I’ve never had a boyfriend.
*goes and hides in room for fear of humiliation*
Oh wait, I don’t have to be humiliated! There is nothing in the above three statements that is means for embarrassment, nothing I’m going to be stoned over. Don’t worry if you’re surprised; this comes as news to me also…
I’ll be honest. I’ve always been a little embarrassed about these fun-facts about my life. When my friends all start sharing their first kiss experiences I just keep quiet until the subject changes… maybe if I don’t look up, they won’t notice I have nothing to add.
Kissing is great (so I’ve heard 😛 ); I am in no way, shape or form putting it down or trying to come across as better than anyone of you out there who have lips that are, ehh, shall we say – a little more utilized than mine? But kissing is nothing to put on your to-do list, to try and cross off as soon as possible because it seems like the thing to do.
My kiss is valuable – why? Because it is a sign of my affection & care for someone and I am valuable. That may seem conceited to say in our culture – but ladies, it’s the truth. You are worth far more than rubies (Proverbs 3:15). This is nothing we acquire on our own though, we are worthy because the King of Kings adopted us as His daughters, which makes us Princesses! HOLLA.
(men, you’re great and valuable too – don’t worry, you get to be Jesus’ bros)
But thanks be to God, as of late I’ve been able to see my past kissing/dating/relationship details as just that – minute details. Yes, they are a part of me and can describe me – but they do not determine my worth, explain my past, or dictate my future.
As Isaiah says in the cave,
“Let him who walks in the dark,
who has no light,
trust in the name of the LORD
and rely on his God.
But now, all you who light fires
and provide yourselves with flaming torches,
go, walk in the light of your fires
and the torches you have set ablaze.
This is what you will receive from my hand:
You will lie down in torment.”
~ Isaiah 50:106-111
Having a very minimal romantic past makes it easy for Satan to attack with lies about that foreshadowing the future. “How could someone who is your age and never been kissed expect to ever date, let alone get married one day?” “You’re so behind already, give up hope now while you have some dignity left”
I may be in a cave, just like Isaiah was… feeling cold, confused, wondering where the light is or somedays if there is even a light at all. But I know I am not alone in this cave. The LORD knows His way around this dark and scary place. He has my hand, He will lead me out into the light of day – to the place I am meant to be, but in His timing, not my own.
So how can I keep my feet on solid ground (my God, my Rock) when I know I was born to fly into the arms of the marriage vocation?
Through complete and reckless entrustment to the One who made my soul. The One who had my dreams and desires in mind when He created me. The One who knows my tomorrows; each and every second of each and every one. The One who loves me more than any man every could or any kiss could every show.
The cave may be dark, but today I choose to trust in the One holding my hand.